Moose Meet

Have you ever had someone just give you a look of contempt? Ever been flashed a glare of annoyance and dismay?

I got that look the other night - from a moose.

I was settling in to watch the evening news the other evening while in Owls Head. Looking through my windows and across the cove, I could see the front yard of one of the neighbors in the left corner of the cove. I just happened to catch sight of something out of the ordinary from across the water. I grabbed the binoculars and confirmed my suspicions.

"Holy Bullwinkle, it's a moose," I thought to myself.

I grabbed the camera and hoofed it down the road like a teeny bopper at a New Kids On The Block reunion appearance.

Seeing wildlife is nothing new around our cove. I've seen osprey, eagles, deer, raccoons, seals, ducks, geese, foxes and even a waddling porcupine or two. I even spotted two moose cross the cove from the island at low tide one morning. I tried chasing them down, but they ducked for cover fasther than Hillary Clinton facing sniper fire.


That's the only time I've seen a moose other than at Baxter State Park. The closest I've been to a moose lately has been by walking past the moose drop earings at L.L. Bean.


So by the time I reached the end of the road the other night. The moose was still standing down by the shore. I tried to move stealthfully - or at least as stealthfully as guy built like a retired out-of-shape linebacker can.


When the moose became aware of my presence, it didn't really seem to care. It first made a move toward the woods but then continued up the road. I crossed over to the opposite side of the paved road from it. I was probably 2o or 30 yards away. I began to try recalling the signs of when a moose is about to charge.


"He shakes his head and wiggles his ears," I thought. "No, that's an elephant."


I realized I didn't know what a moose does just before it charges. Even worse, I couldn't remember what to do if it does charge. Do I run, play dead or pray? Maybe I just step up and deliver a roundhouse right into the snout, just like John Candy did when he popped Marty Moose at Wally World in the movie Vacation. I could see the headlines. "Award-winning journalist KO's Moose."

After looking me over and giving me a look like I wasn't worth bothering with, it turned and headed into the brush. Of course, that meant it was headed for our dirt road. So I walked up with the intent of take pictures of it as it crossed.

The moose didn't look to pleased to realize he hadn't rid itself of me. I moved on down the road, like I was heading home, and waited. Sure enough, the moose came out of the woods and started down the road, as if he was following me. ("Look what I found Mom, can I keep it?").


He stopped and looked me over a bit. I wasn't too worried about it charging anymore. It had long skinny legs like a few seven-foot-six NBA postplayers - all limbs and no skills. It seemed to be a bit disgusted that everywhere it turned, there I was. Apparently, it doesn't like the paparazzi treatment anymore than Brittney Spears.

It turned away and began walking away. He returned to the main road and headed across the field. I continued to following, talking to it all the way, but it just ignored me.

When another person with a dog came out of the woods on the other side of the field, the moose showed just how spry it was. It took off with a gallop, looking a bit like a horse I once bet on (and lost). Finally, the moose had ditched me and taken off up the road to continue his early evening saunter.

While I recant my tale of meeting a moose to others, I can only imagine what it is telling its friends about me.